Monday, September 21, 2009

True ramblings of no concern

Its been a bit since I've posted anything. My first month as as prospect has been great. A real learning experience. Last weekend (not this passed but the one before) at the ACMC (Arizona Confederation of Motorcycle Clubs) which was clear out in AJ (Apache Junction) which just so happens to be on the complete other side of the valley. It was quite the humbling experience. All of these "outlaw clubs" or "1% clubs". There is a protocol, of course, much like any structured group. Much like the military or government. You follow a certain protocol, which includes how you act and what you say. All these clubs have the same structure. President, Vice President, etc. This I already knew, so it was not much of a surprise. I did trip over my words trying to speak to fast. You know what I found out, so did some of the patch holders. They are just as normal as you and I. Not that I expected any different, but quite a few have bad thoughts when the word "biker" comes to mind. The more I think on this, is the ignorance that others have of the unknown and seems to be a jealously of the kind of freedom and rebelliousness to stand up to those who most do not and tell them that they are wrong. Standing up for ones owns God given rights, not the ones that the government so called allows us. I felt very comfortable there. I was honestly looking for some type of law enforcement agency watching us. Its very sad that they feel they need to do that. I was able to be in the meeting for a bit, but could not hear anything they were saying and was quite disappointed. This meeting is all about bikers rights. Didn't last very long before all prospects and hang arounds got sent out of the meeting.

After we went to eat since a couple of us were getting sick from not eating. By this time it was 3:30pm. Our club and 3 others were hosting an event at a local bar. Since I'm a prospect I knew I was going to have to bust my ass, or that was at least what I expected. Turns out I ended up feeling like I had not done enough. Regardless it turned out to be a great event with a pretty good turn out.

So here I lay, a week away from my 2nd church. I still feel like a little kid waiting to open his presents on Christmas Eve. The excitement has still not worn off. It really takes a certain kind of person to go from prospect to patch holder. I look forward to the day I reach that goal.

Countdown is 10 days until Vegas Bikefest. I was fortunate enough to meet 4 Tweets on Saturday for lunch. It was a real pleasure. Jason, Kelly, Tony (and tell Becky as well if you read this) & Alex thank you. You have made my excitement jump way up. You are all very cool and I think we are going to have a great time.

I'm going to end this on a different note. A friend of mine from twitter recently lost a friend named Jock. It took everything I had to read that. I finally broke down and this is going to be a tough end to the post. See, a year and a half ago I had to put my baby to sleep. Before I had her I was never really a big fan of cats. She was a 6-7 year old American Shorthair cat. Her name was Arwen, which I was the elf princess from Lord of the Rings. I hope that writing this will help me vent this so that it doesn't hurt as much. It started out when I adopted her as a kitten. She was super cute. Right after I brought her home she got very sick. Since she was newly adopted we got the free vet visit and all the meds she needed. They said she had a very bad case of kennel cough. Getting her to take the meds, eat and drink was quite a choir. She really did not want any of it. I just continued to love her and also had to force meds as well as water. She got hungry and started eating and drinking on her own again. I had to nurse this little creature back to health. Ever since that her and I were inseparable. If I was laying down, she was laying on or next to me. Many nites she put me to sleep with the vibrating purrs while she was laying on my chest. I have never seen such personality or so much love out of an animal in my life. At that time I used to shave my head. I loved the feeling of her extremely rough tongue on my head so I always got her to lick my head and she did so quite often. Even in bed before I fell asleep. When it was time for me to come home from work, she used to pace the floor until I got there and said hi to her. Saying hi to her was not just simply talking to her. It was picking her up and holding her upside down like a baby while I pet her. This is not normal for cats and she was very trusting of me. As I said about a year and a half ago, she got really sick. I noticed right away. She wouldn't come to me, and was difficult even finding her in the house. I quickly took her in to the vet and they told me she was having kidney failure. Her kidneys were functioning normal strength but would not filter anything so all liquid would pretty much come out when she had to go to the litter box. I spend a couple thousand dollars talking to specialist and said there was really nothing that could be done except dialysis and would cost thousands. Every vet said I should let her die on her own terms or put her to sleep. I saw how she was acting. Even after getting a refresh of fluids she still more less wanted to be alone and die and I could not take it. I could not take seeing this poor little girl suffer. I made the most difficult decision of my entire life. Her life was in my hands and I hated the choices. This is my child! Animal or not! This isn't fair. I spend the entire day and nite holding her and petting her on my chest. The next morning I took her in to get her put to sleep. I feel like I killed my own flesh and blood and it still hurts me to this day. I did get her cremated so I could keep the ashes. Maybe it is a bit morbid, but I have her ashes and talk to her almost every day.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Lifestyles not all the same

Ever try to educate someone about something they had the same misconceptions as the public? I'm not always a nice guy and I don't hide this fact. I am very opinionated and very outspoken, although I do not push my thoughts and beliefs on others because I do not like others doing it to me. I don't know everything, nor do I claim it as I do. I am judgmental. No one said its a good thing to do, but isn't human nature after all? Isn't this the same brain activity that creates prejudice? After an interesting experience today, this really made me think. Why do most accept the ignorance that is told to them as their own? Not everything fits under this, but to judge a person or a group of people based on looks or lifestyle is just silly. If you do not yourself look that way or live that lifestyle. You only know of it what your tiny brain has sponged up from others or even possibly what the media pushes upon others. The media lives by the constitutional right of freedom of speech, but have they taken it to far? I believe so. You can not always believe what you hear without knowing all the facts. In most cases it is the ignorance and closed mindedness that put hurt in the world.

As I said I had quite an experience today. Not particularly a good experience, other then learning from the situation and quickly stepping away. Not to avoid or run, but rather to separate myself from this ignorance. I can tell you that I am close minded in many ways. Although I do try to give the benefit of the doubt. But fortunately I do not see the ignorance in my existence. An ex girlfriend and long time friend had a conversation that got a bit heated on both of our parts. She was judging my brothers and sisters of my club. I automatically got in the defensive mode, which is really never a good start. She was not just saying she doesn't like it but she was pushing her opinion and beliefs about them on me, even tho she has never even seen or met them. I further explained this to her and it escalated. She claimed freedom of speech. At this point I was more then quite annoyed and frustrated so I told her to keep her mouth shut if she has nothing good to say about them to me. My words were very rude and stern. Not the best thing I could have said. The club is my extended family, and is part of who I am, so of course I am going to take it very personal. To make a long story short these are the last words we had (thru online work chat):

Her: they are not family , i guarantee you did something to piss them off, they'd shoot your ass faster than you can say sorry, but if it happens, let me know so i can say i told you so
Her: I'm done.
Me: Just the ignorance most of the general public has. Done, I doubt you will ever be, but I sure as hell am.
Me: You can take your close mindedness and keep it to yourself far away from me.

This is exactly what I really expected she was thinking. Too many people think this same way, even tho they really have no idea. I agree that the MC lifestyle is much different, but please do not shun us for what or who we are. We live as we should. We are not the types that the public thinks we are. This kind of thinking only puts fear into others, when there is no reason to fear. We are not criminals, we are not thugs, we are hard working individuals who are motorcycle enthusiasts and love to be around those that enjoy the same.